Sologamia, or the tendency to marry oneself, is a topic that is in vogue, especially for those who consider that their happiness does not depend on others. Traditionally, many people have believed in the myths of love; therefore, they think they need to find their “rib” or “better half”. However, this is beginning to reverse.
Now, a new group of individuals arises who consider that their happiness does not depend on others, and they are conceived as complete beings. This belief goes to the limit of marrying himself. So far, more women are beginning to practice sologamia.
Solitude is not loneliness
Those who observe these attitudes from the outside, tend to think that those who practice sologamia are lonely people or narcissistic individuals , who do not know the happiness of sharing with someone else.
However, it is worth noting that sologamia is not loneliness. Those who practice it have made it clear that they find the best possible company: themselves. In fact, studies indicate that loneliness can be defined, following Sullivan, as:
“An unpleasant experience, associated with a lack of interpersonal intimacy.”
While other research defines this state as:
“The absence of attachment relationships, that is, especially significant relationships for the person, and that provide a secure base.”
However, the detail with sologamia is that the secure base is not outside, but within each of those who practice it.
Also read: 6 ways to combat your fear of loneliness
Why marry yourself?
Those who conceive of sologamia as the best way to give themselves love is because they have made a commitment to love each other without expecting this feeling from others. That is to say, well-being, self-confidence, and the fullness of love are not sought in another person, nor is it requested, but is obtained from within.
Although it is a fairly new trend, it is already beginning to travel quite a few parts of the world, so it could be said that it is becoming more and more successful.
Those who assume marriage with themselves do so because:
- They do not believe that their happiness depends on others.
- They don’t want a conventional marriage.
- They observe the high divorce rates, but they know that with themselves this will not exist. The only way to self-divorce is to stop loving yourself, something that will never happen.
- They don’t believe in traditional marriages.
- They do not want to experience the crises that traditionally formed couples experience.
It may interest you: Discover the benefits of loneliness
Sologamia and legality
An important aspect that must be considered is that the Sologamia, for now, has a legal vacuum, since it is not found in current laws. However, it is possible that over time this legal vacuum will end up being filled, as more and more women decide to make this commitment .
If this trend continues to grow, perhaps one day, the legal system will end up including it.
How is sologamia celebrated?
In this type of marriages, the protagonists dress in white, with bridal gowns, invite their loved ones, bring bridesmaids and make toasts . The cakes are also usually showy, of enormous sizes; Event rooms are rented, and some women actually go on honeymoon and then send postcards from their destination.
Rings are not a problem either, because those who tire of themselves give themselves a ring of self-commitment. The rise of these celebrations is so accelerated that there are already companies that are dedicated to serving these people . An example of this is I Marry Me.
These companies are dedicated to planning everything related to the event so that nothing fails that day , as well as collecting the stories of the women who decide to take this big step. The most exciting thing about these ceremonies is the reading of the vows. Most women say:
“I promise to love myself, love myself and respect myself more every day, I renounce self-sabotage and attract failure into my life; from now on I promise to treat myself with great respect, honor and love. “
It is definitely a very striking trend. These weddings can be held on the shore of a beach or in a church, if desired . Nothing is superfluous when it comes to showing love to yourself.