Sexist behaviors are present in many areas . Indeed, in the workplace, at school, on the street, etc … Unfortunately, we can find them practically anywhere and the bed is no exception. A macho personality will be in all aspects of his life, including sex.
The dictionary of the Royal Academy defines machimo in two ways:
- Attitude of arrogance of men with respect to women.
- A form of sexism characterized by the prevalence of the male.
According to both definitions, we can see that it is a way of thinking, acting and behaving derived from the belief that man is superior to woman and, therefore, must prevail over her.
Thus, a macho behavior is not limited to a single area of life. Indeed, it can occur in work, family, society, art, even in legislation. In many cases, it is so subtle that it is even difficult to detect.
Therefore, sex is no exception: a macho, if he is, will not stop being one in intimate relationships. This means that, even in the sexual sphere, they will manifest their macho behaviors.
However, just as we do not have to endure phallocracy in any other way, we must not tolerate certain macho behaviors in sex either. How can we identify them? What are the macho behaviors in sex that we should not tolerate?
We recommend you read: Beliefs that macho people have
Some macho behaviors in sex:
Believe that “no” is “yes”
Let’s start with the most basic: no no. However, there is a highly macho belief that assumes that when a woman says “no”, she actually means “yes.” That is, if you insist, in the end the woman will give in.
This is a really widespread belief that can be easily verified, even today. Indeed, many blogs and websites indicate that “women are like that”, that they like “to make things difficult” and that, in fact, they are willing. It can even be verified in international projection movie scenes.
Well, it’s time to make it clear that “no” means “no” and nothing more than “no”. Point.
Sex is sharing, it is enjoying together and it must be a fully conscious decision of both members of the couple. Therefore, if one of them says no, there will simply be no sex. Because sex can never be forced, it cannot be forced on the other person either physically or psychologically.
Therefore, even if there are passionate and ardent kisses and the thing seems to lead to bed but at the last moment you are not sure and you do not want, you simply do not want. No one can force you nor should you feel obligated. Similarly, no one has the right to call you certain things for not having continued and maintained a sexual relationship.
“I don’t wear a condom”
Another of the classic macho behaviors in sex is that the man refuses to wear protection. In this sense, a “I control” or “I am clean” tag usually follows. Perhaps even a “if you want, use something yourself.”
This type of sexist behavior shows the arrogance of the man who considers that any negative aspect that could derive from sex (sexually transmitted diseases, for example) is not his responsibility but that of the woman. In this way, any consequence of sexual intercourse is solely the woman’s fault.
Well, no. Sex is an activity in which two people participate and two people are responsible. Neither is more so than the other. Therefore, you are within your right to request that there be protection and that responsibility be assumed. And, of course, you are not obliged to accept any type of sexual relationship without adequate protection.
Oral sex is only done by women
Of course, for a sexist, sex revolves around the pleasure of the man, leaving that of the woman in second place. For this reason, normally a male chauvinist will refuse to perform oral sex on his partner , demanding, however, that it be done to him.
Indeed, macho behaviors tend to forget that women also need stimulation, that they also have their preferences and needs, and that not everything is sexual intercourse or male orgasm. Because, in fact, for many sexists, sex is aimed at a man’s orgasm and, after achieving it, sex is over.
Well, no. Sex is much more than that. Sex has preliminaries and there is also equally important subsequent activity (kisses, caresses, bonding). It should be satisfying for both of you and not just for one. Both must enjoy.
Thus, precisely in relation to oral sex practiced on women so that they can enjoy the clitoral orgasm, for the sexist it is a “waste of time” or, even, a “degradation”.
We recommend you read: Physiology of the female orgasm
The macho behaviors in sex tend to see the woman as an object for the pleasure of the man. Indeed, your wishes, fantasies or needs do not count. Sex begins with and for the male, aiming at his satisfaction.
On the other hand, we must bear in mind that, unfortunately, the macho is not only rooted in the mentality of some men, but that this also has serious consequences in the way of thinking and acting of many women who believe that if they do not give in , they will not be pleasing the male.
We must, therefore, also become aware as women that assertiveness is important and necessary. Likewise, we must understand that sex is a matter of two, and should be as pleasant for one as for the other.